third week of uni has ended. time flies. and i've yet to class part. i'm in deep shit.
i just can't seem to bring myself to raise up my hand and raise a point. sighhh. why must i be like that? i wish my skin was 10m thick and my brain was that of a genius. then i'll become the most awesome class participation freak. HAHA! my current goal is to speak in class this coming week. on a positive note, only 2 out of 5 of the classes require active class part. i wonder when i'll ever get use to doing this.  hopefully by next year, i'll adapt and dare to be more vocal. i find that this is the worst part of uni. maybe it's just me. i'm weird like that.
oh another thing bothering my mind is cca. i know cca is important and i want to have an awesome cca life. but, recently i feel like i don't know what i want. i thought i wanted to join sound foundry (some band cca thing), but now it seems like i'm not so passionate about it after all. maybe i've been looking too much at self, trying to find a cca that can satisfy my self desires. well, not wrong. but i guess after today's learning journey during the yz field trip session to the toa payoh estate, i've come to realise that the world is greater than that. so maybe i shouldn't be so hard up on finding a cca that serves self, but one that serves the community. so maybe my decision to join uni-y is the right choice.
i was thinking to myself, even though i join sound foundry, when they have performances on fri night/sat night, i'll be so sian to go cos i probably have other more important commitments, like church. the down side is that i stupidly paid this $5 membership fee thing. well, i'll console myself that 5 bucks can only get you one meal. treat it as a donation.
after seeing that state of the poorer part of the toa payoh estate, we all felt that something has to be done. but i can't come up with a good solution. spending time talking to the people through house visits does brighten up their day, but it kinda ends there. like it isn't going to help them become self-sustainable. so maybe some form of education? education helps people break out of the poverty cycle.
it baffles me that in some parts of singapore, people can't even afford $26/month to pay for housing rental and yet every single person in university owns a laptop (even macbook) and i confess to being part of that community. so it's time for us to do something. to actually open our eyes, take responsibility for the other group of people in our society and make an impact to their lives. this is also one aspect in which it'll be a good testament of the christian faith and love. still in the midst of thinking what we, as a community in Christ, can do for the less fortunate. in the mean time, i'll contribute to society through the uni-y activities.
well, i hope that i will continue to be able to cope in uni. as of now, the work load is very manageable, partly cos the projects haven't kicked in. but i believe all will turn out fine. anyway, i should enjoy the process, not the outcome.
till then,

J.