it's been almost a year since my graduation and about 5 months since i've started working. well, a good time to reflect on working life thus far before i lose my thoughts and start becoming jaded by work.
i'm thankful for where i am right now. my work allows me to have sufficient time to do other things i love, to go back on time, to still have dinner with my family, to meet friends and to not compromise my areas of service in church. back then when i was still job hunting, i wanted a job that would allow me to continue doing the things i just wrote about in the previous sentence (although i wasn't sure if it was possible in this day and age). what can i say? God answers prayers and He knows my needs even more clearly than i do. i can only praise Him and thank Him for His goodness.
hearing about my friends' working life and experiences, i'm glad to be where i am. some are already feeling weary and are starting to lose sight of the purpose of all this work. some are possibly enjoying themselves and finding work fulfilling because they have been learning much from it. i'm glad i didn't take up the job offer from KPMG back when i applied for external audit just cos i jumped on the bandwagon to feel more secure about getting a job. i know for a fact i wouldn't have survived 1 month of external audit. but sometimes, thoughts about how my current job is completely not helping me further my understanding in what i've learnt in uni start to creep into my mind. what i've studied has not much relevance to my nature of work and sometimes i feel like i'm wasting my brain away because my current work is not stimulating my brain at all. plus the fact that people keep asking about how long i'm gonna stay at my current job, only leaves me questioning myself about what am i really trying to get out of my working life.
before starting work, i've always thought that i'll be okay with doing a job not related to my area of study in uni and that it's okay to have a relaxed job that doesn't require much thinking and all. but after 5 months, i'm starting to feel like perhaps it'll be better to have something that stimulates my brain. but then again, i'm also not sure what i want (which is always the case, like when i was job hunting too).
so, i feel like it all boils down to this: what do i want to achieve from my work? what is it that gives me fulfilment and purpose in life? do i want a stimulating job that makes use of my accounting knowledge and allows me to rise up the ranks in the corporate world? or do i just want to be satisfied with where i am and focus more on people interactions than on the actual nature of my job? can i say both? i'm not too sure also.
i don't think i'll ever be sure about what i want because as always, i don't know what's the best for me, i don't know what i really want, i don't know many things. all i know is that at least i know of Someone who knows everything. i'm glad that i'm not alone in all this. i want to continue to trust God to bring me to places, to lead and direct my path. God has brought me to my current job for sure, and He has a purpose for placing me in this place. i just wanna glorify Him with what i do and be a good testimony to the people around. i always believe it's no coincidence for the people He has placed in my life along the way. perhaps i'm to be used by Him to touch their lives or bring them a step closer to knowing God.
already i am amazed by what God has done at my work place. never would i have imagined to be able to have a small christian fellowship at my work place. as much as it was something ideal, i never saw how it would actually come to reality but God works in ways we least expect. it is such an encouragement to have fellow christians at the work place, knowing that you're not alone in this christian journey. i am excited to see how God will continue to use this christian fellowship group for His glory, how we can be His channels of blessing to the people around.
all in all, my heart is filled with thankfulness. for a God who never fails, who is always faithful and is my Provider. i'm thankful for this job i'm in so far and even though i'm uncertain about how long i'll remain at the job, what other job opportunities may come my way in the future, i know God will go before me and direct my path. all i need to do is to be sensitive to hear His voice and the obedience to follow His leading. i don't want to be drowned in the world's voice and definition of what success is, i don't want to be influenced by what my peers think because the only One whose thought matters is the One who created me, the One who's in control of the whole universe.
even as i reflect on this 5 months into my job, i hope that many years after starting work, i'll still be able to find my bearings, where Christ is my centre and His Word is my compass.
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